What's Beef? or Hell yes, I shoot messengers.

Fun facts about the Natural one and the Eys (ice). Ying and Yang. Naturally Alise is a nice person. She is usually ready with a smile and comforting word (in public anyway). Eysqueen is not a nice person. She has zero tolerance for bs and is kinda blunt with hers (currently competing with PBG (author of Hey You Asked & SWHHW ) for the evilest blogger on this side of the net award, but is slipping daily. Hopefully this blog will bring her back up.).

With this said, I’m about to tear a whole into some bs that passed my screen the other day. I can’t stand manipulative people. These are people who don’t have the social grace or cajonas to say and do what they really want so they have to use people. They use people to express how they really feel. They use people to do the things they wish they could do. Someone has been manipulated on the outskirts of our world, the manipulated victim thusly tried to throw salt in our universe. It was all pretty transparent to me. So all I have to say is don’t let yourself be open to manipulation.

If someone who you ain’t cool with offers you a present, you are being manipulated.
If someone passes on to you information that no good can come of, that you can’t do anything about and has all around f*cked up your day, you have been manipulated.
If you find yourself with a birdie that is constantly squawking in your ear and you don’t know where the hell it came from and why it won’t shut up, you are being manipulated.

Now, evil Eys wanted to make a lesson out of said manipulated victim as a warning to the main manipulator, but nice Alise doesn’t subscribe to that kind of debauchery, and because she is my friend and I have to live with her on this blog, I’ll oblige.

I will say this, I’m not one to back down from confrontation, if the issue is about me. If it isn’t about me, I could care the f*ck less, so don’t bring it to me. I still might catch a case just because you are being stupid though. In other words don’t bring nonsense to me. If your beef is legit, meet me outside…

And don’t bring nonsense to my peeps, we ride or die and I’m always ready to ride…

Have a happy Friday ya’ll!

*Alise adds just for good measure, since it is "The Wire" Friday, picture this as Alise & Tiha instead of Bunk & Omar (yeah Tiha is crazy like Omar, lol)*

R & B Amber Alert: Turned Away

Applications... I call shenanigans.

Ok y'all, I also have a part time job at a drug store so not only am I a Cubicle Crusader but also an Hourly Wage Warrior on the side, so my days are always extra special......good times.... that is just some background for the following conversation about application processes, job interviews, rejection, being "Turned Away" (i.e. rejected) from jobs... I am rambling, play the video, laugh at Chukii Booker's flat top shag action, and read the ramblings of 2 overworked, under stimulated sistas!

"Turned Away", by Chuckii Booker

T 2U: how'd you get your second job? just walk in there?
Alise: applied online and he called me the very next day
Alise: and i started 4 days later
T 2U: WOW!
Alise: why dont all jobs work like that
T 2U: okay!
Alise: tell me yes or no and keep it moving
Alise: do you know what I hate worse than anything?
Alise: ok well maybe not anything but irks me nonetheless.... multiple interviews
Alise: dont call me back for no second interview
Alise: just make a decision already
Alise: i can deal with rejection, i'm black, I'm used to it, don't make it linger
Alise: i feel a blog a-coming
T 2U: about job rejection?
T 2U: or the applicant dance?
Alise: all of the above
Alise: the applicant dance is kinda like the Cube dance, but with more intricate steps
Alise: cube dance is the two step or like the Cha Cha slide, the applicant dance is like that Dancing with the stars shit
Alise: mambos and foxtrots
T 2U: i dont understand why these simple jobs want to know all of your info
T 2U: ie best buy wants exstensive employment history
Alise: exactly
Alise: like i said at the Liquor incense and shit emporium we will have NO applications
Alise: list your favorite movies, ipod playlist, and your blogroll
T 2U: i do not feel like finishing this app at all, not for best buy
T 2U: costco is even more rigourous
Alise: i forgot, for cvs i did have to do some personality evaluation thing online, that was just ludicrous
T 2U: ka-razy because then they still have shitty employees
Alise: maybe it is not meant for our understanding.... sigh....

Okay now play the video one more time and laugh at Chuckii Booker's hair, him, Troop, MC Hammer, and Kwame had to all have been going to the same hairdresser, I'm just saying....... Get ready for Operation Shawshank* kicking off next week. (but that's just between me and you, snitches still get stitches...) Happy Friday Cube Sabbath y'all!

*yay for my exit strategy- the lunies have torn the padding off the walls now... -eysqueen

News From the Field

This is cubicle crusader # 0220 reporting from the field. The other day I came up against heavy (management) enemy fire, I was surrounded and since I’m off coffee I’m not as sharp as I used to be. They rolled up on me with a sneak attack and I had to go retro with the fire safety rules, I dropped and rolled. Screaming into my walkie talkie "Top Flight Security of the World,Craig! “code 10 man down man down!”, my fellow cubicle crusader threw me a line and I snatched up the rope and pulled myself outta there. Ladies and gentlemen, I have to tell you what I’ve uncovered: the lunatics are running the asylum! Yes yes I know, how can that be? Well I don’t know how its come to pass, but after a series of completely asinine events, culminating with the sneak attack on my dignity, I have more people the empirical data to prove it. Now is the time for some serious exit strategy plans for ya girl. I implore all crusaders of the cube, all of you soldiers of the revolution, to submit any ideas or suggestions for getting me out of here. They are coming after my sanity ya’ll and I’m not sure how much longer I can hold them off.

Reporting live from the field, this is cubicle crusader #0220 signing off…

*

*This just in: Cubicle Crusader Java-lin has gotten the message and is on the matter. Mission Shawshank is in full effect once I get my coffee and shit....